Citric Dummies

Reviews

Citric Dummies Split With Turnstile LP

Minneapolis cut-ups CITRIC DUMMIES return with their fourth LP, Split With Turnstile, which—consider yourself warned—is not a split with TURNSTILE at all. They put up a snotty front, but all hijinks aside, across eleven high-energy songs in twenty minutes they blast out buoyant, tongue-in-cheek punk propelled by D.V. Tinner’s hyperactive drumming. It’s fast without tipping into hardcore, landing somewhere between the BROKEDOWNS and DEAN DIRG. My buddy Tom says parts of it sound like a less crusty ANNIHILATION TIME, and he’s not wrong. Even when they’re yelling “I Don’t Like Anything,” the whole thing still bursts with this dumb, irresistible sense of fun. I fucking love this record. Immediate top ten material.

Citric Dummies Trapped in a Parking Garage EP

Hyperactive, absurdist goofball punk that has me imagining the SPITS on speed in a street brawl with HENRY FIAT’S OPEN SORE. I saw DEAN DIRG once and their singer was wearing sweatpants. CITRIC DUMMIES wear matching satin jackets! They may be dummies but they ain’t no idiots. Trapped in a Parking Garage takes all the vim and vigor of the 2023 full-length Zen and the Arcade of Beating Your Ass and cooks it down to six minutes of sheer lunacy. Fast and fun garage punk where the punk part should actually come first. Look out world…they’re eating Arby’s!

Citric Dummies Zen and the Arcade of Beating Your Ass LP

Killer LP from Minneapolis punks CITRIC DUMMIES, who sound like an amphetamine-fueled MISFITS. I mean it, the singer is pretty much doing a DANZIG impersonation here. Don’t ask me how, but it works. Throughout fourteen tracks, CITRIC DUMMIES stick to their successful formula of straightforward, rabid punk with an occasional pop of color, like the saxophone on “Drugs in the Snow” and the keyboards on “My True Love is Depression” and “Doing Dope at Chucky Cheese.” Overall I recommend it, especially if you need something to play at your next kegger.

Citric Dummies Die Nasty cassette

There needs to be a few CITRIC DUMMIES-type bands around at any given time, otherwise punk might collapse in on itself and lose its intrinsic ability to revel in the theatre of the absurd, or something like that. By “CITRIC DUMMIES-type bands,” I mean ones who write energetic bangers (that aren’t really hardcore or skate punk or garage or KBD-type stuff, although if any of those things are your jam you might like this), with genuinely funny, obnoxious lyrics (that aren’t “anti-PC” or somesuch). BRUTAL KNIGHTS were probably the last band to bat a comparable average on this front to these guys from Minneapolis, and although Die Nasty doesn’t have any lines that have induced actual belly laughter Á  la “I H8 Birds” or “Where the Fuck Were You?” from previous DUMMIES outings, it’s as ribald as a tape with an opening song called “Your Ex-Girlfriend is Dating a Nazi” oughta be. For some reason you have to download it and/or play the actual tape to hear it mixed properly, and it intentionally sounds like shit if you just stream it, although no doubt some people will prefer that version.