Schizos Banned! From the Hi Tone cassette

I want to make my own “If you don’t like SCHIZOS, fuck you” shirt. They’re such a refreshing band in that you know immediately if you’re in their corner or not. And if you’re not, friend, you should sip your beer elsewhere. This is beautifully unhinged and sounds shit-hot (I mean, recorded by Erik Nervous and mastered by Will Killingsworth, so no surprises there). There are very few groups that I’d rather hear a live recording of (I’m reminded of OBN III’s Live in San Francisco for the extra jolt of energy and the combative stage presence) and now I have another. And then there’s just the biggest dick-kicking cover of “Born 2 Be Wild” that actually manages to make me finally get that song. What this tape really gets across is that while the narrative is that this is totally unhinged, chaotic rock‘n’roll, this band is tighter than Rambo’s bowstring. Where I expected a sloppy, glorious blaze of glory, I got a band that knows exactly who they are and exactly how to blow up a stage. Heavy as hell. Wish I were there. Doubt I’d remember if I were.

Schizos Fuck Music City EP

Holy moly! I think these guys have finally figured it out. This New Orleans-via-Nashville act got off to a rough start—their 2017 debut as, like, a minimal drum-and-synth OBLIVIANS tribute act really rubbed me the wrong way. Even still, I always felt like they had some promise. And sure enough, they’ve steadily improved from record to record. Their 2020 LP saw them going more of a straight REATARDS route with solid enough results. Then they really tightened things up on last year’s Come Back With a Warrant EP—a fantastic record! But I’ll be damned if Fuck Music City doesn’t manage to blow that record out the water somehow. It’s odd that the addition of Drew Owen a.k.a. SICK THOUGHTS (he’s providing “instruments”) ended up making the band sound less like the REATARDS, but that’s what we’re dealing with. The A-side of the record is three quick tracks that borrow as much from USHC as they do Memphis garage punk. It’s leaner and meaner than anything this project has committed to tape but still scuzzy as all get-out—just perfect shit! Then they get loose on the B-side with “Going South,” a track that runs three-and-a-half minutes and sounds like that period of NWOBHM that was still pretty heavily influenced by boogie rock. It rules. Buy this record!

Schizos Come Back With a Warrant EP

SCHIZOS return faster and meaner and less like a JAY REATARD ripoff and more like the CANDY SNATCHERS at their most drugged and dangerous. The whole packaging is a parody/tribute to LYNYRD SKYNYRD’s first and best, down to the cigarette pack poster. I know everyone at MRR digs SKYNYRD as much as I do, so look out for this to make some year-end top tens. SCHIZOS continue their knack for song title mastery with “I’m Always First” followed by “Gross” followed by “Ugly.” Genius! Each song gets better, culminating in the title track which is like the best, punkest, meanest version of “Gimme Back My Bullets” you’ve never heard. Cheers, broken bottles and trashed halls await. It’s past my curfew.

Schizos Schizos LP

This Nashville band has been on my To Listen To list for awhile and thanks to the Supreme Gods of Punk at MRR, I’m enjoying this hot piece of teen angst in this comfort of my isolation cell. Pissed off, blown out to hell and over in minutes. Just how I like it. Think “Blowjobs” by GG AND THE SCUMFUCS but angrier and faster, this kicks off with the 2:17 minute magnum opus “Driller” and proceeds to burrow a happy hole from your skull to your spine. “ATF,” “BAR”, “Juice Is Loose”…minutes feel like seconds until this rectal lobotomy leaves you a warm puddle of soil and blood. The last thumps of “Banned In Birmingham” blows my system. Fuuuck. It’s young, it’s bratty, and it’s annoying as all fuckall. I love them. I hate them. I want to be them. SICK THOUGHTS, early OBLIVIANS…blah, blah. Buy it. Take it to the grave.