The Monsters


The Monsters Du Hesch Cläss, Ig Bi Träsch LP

Listen to this shit. It was records like this that steered Tim Yo away from hardcore (and emo) in the ’90s and damn near turned MRR into a fucking garage rock fanzine. You know why? Listen to this shit. This is punk, you punk! Switzerland’s the MONSTERS have been a band since I was still getting ink on my fingers once a month, and they’re still dropping steaming piles of shit-hot fire on your turntable like they don’t give a shit where they shit. Because these motherfuckers are punk. Their suits are punk. Their two-riff songs are punk. Their blown-out solos are punk. Apparently there’s a version in English, but I’m gonna be so shitfaced before the first side is over that I won’t be able to speak (in any language). Volume is the international language of punk though, so crank the mindfuck titled “Mitfahr Glägeheit” and see god, you punk. If you can’t get down with cranked-out, fuzz-storm garage mania, then what are you even doing with your life?

The Monsters You’re Class, I’m Trash CD

It feels like there’s been a steady flow of product out of the LIGHTNING/REVEREND BEAT-MAN camp as of late. Here’s another long-player of the best of the bunch, the MONSTERS. You get much of the same matching-suit Euro kind of garage trash rock. This is especially true on songs like “Smell My Tongue” and “Get Drunk on You,” which are great but nothing really special. It’s the noisier psych and horror-inspired numbers such as “Carpool Lane,” “Devil Baby,” and the two versions of the song “Dead” that make this really a thing. There’s two great Euro horror-inspired videos of these latter tracks online as well, which are pretty swell. COVID has been kind to the MONSTERS and allowed creativity to flow as to create some memorable art here. They’re just so Swiss! Look at their pictures and you’ll know exactly what I mean. I feel like the LSD has gotten pretty good there lately, so tune in, drop in…blahhh.

The Monsters I’m a Stranger to Me / Carpool Lane 7″

These MONSTERS are a Swiss trash-garage combo that started kicking rocks way back in the ’80s and are fronted by the honorable Rev. Lightning Beat Man. Beat Man runs Voodoo Rhythm Records, so the dude is not a stranger to loud-ass dirt rock, but I was still surprised by the grit that’s caked over these new recordings. The A-side is a hi-energy rave-up that shows a generation of Burger-fed youth how it’s done. Gnarly. “Carpool Lane” slows down just a hair so that herk-jerk verses can alternate with heavy bursts of fuzz as an analog synth zaps the aliens lurking on the side of the road. A cassette version slathers on a host of extra tracks.